18. i’d rather shoot

i opened up my floral pink journal for 2016 to a random page,

it was may 6th and it was a new moon. that should’ve meant something to me,

and it does,

but not so much?

i read out the name of that friday in russian and felt a slight sense of pride.

st. andrew was the first student to follow Jesus, hence why we call him “the first called” in orthodoxy;

and i love him, too, i think;

if love constitutes of tingling and getting too, too close, yes, i do.

i do examine things too closely and i notice all the details and i don’t want to watch Interstellar (2014) even if you beg me, it’s a good film but i don’t want to see it again, i promise.

i’m so weak, i thought i was running a fever but i wasn’t really, i’m tchaikovsky cause i’m russian and



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